I made an old lady blush today at work because she ordered two senior coffees and I said “SENIOR ? I’m sorry miss, i’m going to have to ask to see some ID.” and she covered her mouth and went “Oh dear me” and couldn’t stop smiling
escalators are better than elevators because when escalators break they turn into stairs but when elevators break they turn into vertical coffins
”?!” makes a sound in my head, but I can’t describe what it is.
Nothing more hilarious than seeing a guy’s behavior towards you completely change as soon as he realizes he’ll never get anything out of his interaction.
I’m anti-feminist for many of the same reasons I’m an atheist.
So you don’t believe women exist?
Its okay. I’m an atheist because I don’t believe in something I can’t see or touch. I suppose women are much like that for you.
Somebody get him some ice.
look at this fragile delicate flower of a man look at how precarious his value and identity is wonder at the marvel that is masculinity
men are pathetic
me when doing assignments
ppl always ask me “”what are you going to do with your degree”“ and “"if you wanna get a PHD how do you plan on paying for it"" and ""where are you gonna move after college"" but here is the thing:
i am very powerful and cute and im gonna float through this world one day at a time. please leave me alone.